Thursday, April 10, 2003

IKEA Masters

If you didn’t know, IKEA delivers furniture in about 7,000 parts.
Ironically, the manual that accompanies your purchase is oddly
simple. It contains drawings that resemble those one might find
in a Playmobil toy set. The drawings are big and exaggerated
with lots of dotted lines and arrows. I’ve also noticed that there
are a lot of screws and washers in an IKEA purchase yet there
never seem to be enough screws for washers or washers for
screws. This is never a good sign. When you call IKEA for
more screws or washers or rails or table legs or wheels or
whatever it might be that they forget to send you, you should
know that everyone you will need to talk to in regards to screws
or washers or rails or table legs or wheels will mostly likely
be in a meeting. People by the name of Sue, Beenie, Deeanne,
Jed or Rainy will not be able to assist you. Trust me. Lucikly,
I have discovered one amazing thing about myself over the past
few weeks during our various massive furniture deliveries for
the new office…and that is that I actually have a talent for
assembling furniture. Good to know should this college degree
in Creative Writing thing not work out…

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