Sunday, July 11, 2004

AMERICANS ARE FAT-I BLAME APPLEBEE'S



Have you ever been to Applebee's? It sucks. We decided
to stop there on a recent road trip because it was the
only thing around that seemed like it might actually
serve a salad.

Here are my deep thoughts on Appplebee's:

-Why is it Applebee's-apostrophe? Who does it belong to?

-Why the tag line 'the neighborhood favorites you've grown
to love'. Grown? As in were repulsed by the food before
but now somehow manage to force something down.

-Portions-why is everything on the menu you order enough
to feed a family of four? And when you take my order for
a small drink and call it 'super sized'-this confuses me.
Even more so, when you ask if I want my super sized drink
(small) upgraded to a 'grande' what could this possibly
mean? Something with an undertow?

-Why ask me when I order my salad if I want 'bacon, cheese
and egg on that'? I didn't order an Egg McMuffin.

-And lastly-the secret is out people. We figured out the
'wild' ingredients of your 'mexi-ranch' dressing. It is
salsa and ranch dressing. Back to the food lab for you.

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