Friday, December 10, 2004

RECENT POLLS

Hi. Ok.

So recent polls on MTD say that the majority of you want me to blog about the following:

-Wedding plans
-Bridal shower gifts such as edible underwear
-How to prevent my relatives from ruining my wedding
-How to LAY DOWN THE LAW during my bridal shower games
-How to avoid wedding nonsense
-How to say two words without people asking me about my wedding

And my personal favorite “Marriage #1” because “it’s GOT to be a good story”.
Wow. Where to begin.

How about first…HAVE ANY OF YOU EVER READ MY BLOG? Perhaps you are confusing my blog with ivillage.com or starjones.com or oprah.com or imighttotallybarf.net.

The good news is you infuriated me back into blogging and for that I am truly, truly grateful.

Regarding the blog suggestion about “Marriage #1” and how it’s 'got to be a good story'. Before I blog about that I’d like you to first share with me in great detail:

-How three good friends of yours lost babies in a month
-How someone you love suffered from an eating disorder
-How a fellow co-worker at your old job committed suicide
-How your cat was taken away from you
-How you were laid off
-How you were evicted from your home with 24hrs notice
-How you went through a painfully sad divorce leaving two families ripped apart to mere shreds

Then…after you’ve combined all of the above bullets into one story…all happening in one month…then I will post my story. Oh wait. That is my story. And trust me when I tell you-it is not a good one.

Instead I’d like to tell you about more important things such as how much I love blood oranges and also how totally bummed I am that the underwear I am currently wearing is riding so far up my ass that it's quite possible I can floss my teeth.

7 Comments:

At 12:28 AM, Blogger posthipchick said...

well, glad i could help (?).
you are always so cheerful, sometimes i forget about your sensitive side.

 
At 1:48 AM, Blogger posthipchick said...

and NOW, because my jewish guilt is kicking in further, i needed to tell you that i had it in my head that you married for his citizenship or something. ok, i'll stop talking about it now. thank you.

 
At 6:44 AM, Blogger blackbird said...

Wow. Glad I didn't come up with that marriage thing.
I was gonna ask you whether or not you work freelance -- cause hub works in your "industry" --- i think, anyway.
Well...what about thongs? I am guessing you don't wear em, what with the underwear up your butt not being so comfy.
We don't ever have to talk about marriage ---nope....

 
At 9:26 PM, Blogger Brooke said...

Well, the thong thing works. And if you can work the blood oranges thing in too, so much the better.

 
At 5:04 PM, Blogger Eliot said...

Yeah, that's sad and all - but HOW DO you feel about "sweater meat"?

 
At 11:44 PM, Blogger sfist said...

wait- what happened to your cat?

 
At 4:35 PM, Blogger Shiz said...

Oh. My. God.

Well, that blows. Let's drink something alcoholic! And thank God for therapy.

And who in the heck wanted to hear about edible underwear? This is not the place for that. I have just decereed it.

 

Post a Comment

<< Home


powered by SignMyGuestbook.com