WHAT IT'S LIKE TO DATE ME
It will be 7am and I will tap you on the shoulder in my bra and underwear with a headband on and crazy wild hair sticking out saying,
K: Um...there is a roach. In the bathroom.
And then you will say,
E: Oh really? Ok.
And then you will roll over to go back to bed. And then I will politely wait a moment or two and then I will tap you on the shoulder again and say,
K: Actually, um...can you kill it? Because it's GIGANTIC and it's in the shower. It has long hairy horrible legs. I'm late for work.
And then I will wait outside the door because I can't even watch. And then even though I hear the entire hitting and smashing and flushing process when you come out and say it's 'safe to go in' now I will say,
K: Are you sure? Are you sure it's dead?
and really mean it.