WHOOPI-what AH YA doin'
If you were looking for the where abouts of Whoopi Goldberg on Saturday night I know where she was. She was making me a Stoli Cranberry in Massachusetts at a local bar called Captain Carlo’s Seafood.
I know when many of you read this you will think I am completely insane and full of crap. The rest of you that don’t think that will think I’m racist or nuts because it was just someone that ‘looked’ like Whoopi. It wasn’t. It was friggin’ Whoopi Goldberg wearing a peach striped shirt and jeans and her hair back and those signature annoying sunglasses and there was a Prince cover band and let me tell you it was one of the most surreal moments of my life.
I am from New York. I see celebrities all of the time. This should not be a big deal to me. But somehow thanks to the combo of being in this funky local bar with real Massachusetts locals and some frat boys and Whoopi-blew my mind.
When my friends were driving me there I was making fun of THEM saying THEY were full of shit until I saw her with my very own eyes. Was she doing research for an upcoming role? Does she summer here? What was the DEAL??? Luckily, I had a fantastic resource. My friend’s father is the mayor of the town. Apparently Whoopi called a meeting with the mayor telling him to have the local press back off and leave her alone. She’s friends with the owner and she herself is part-owner of the bar.
The night I saw Whoopi, a local, rough around the edges woman with a ‘Tina’ tattoo sensed my surprise (jaw drop–eyes wide) and nudged me in the ribs as I waited for my drink,
T: (thick Boston accent) Wic-kid re-ta-did, huh?
K: Uh…yes! Very weird!
T: She’s not nice ee-tha. I was in hee once. I said somethin’ about her bah being too crowded and how the wait for a drink was ha-rrible. She grabbed my shirt and said, ‘Don’t talk shit about this bah!’
T: Yeah. And I said, ‘Go back te Ha-lee-wood Squares!'