Wednesday, July 27, 2005

THE EYEBROWS WILL HAVE TO WAIT

The other night - after heading to the subway having finished one gazillion errands around the hot, sticky city wearing tight fitting, black, Seven jeans - ugh - bad call - I ran into an old friend - New York based, South African born, celebrity make-up artist Layla.

The first thing she noticed were my eyebrows:

L: K? What's happened? (running her fingers over them)
K: I know. I know.
L: It's horrible. Let us go for drinks at once to discuss.

The combination of her serious tone and her South African accent, indicated that Layla might just have to perform an emergency eyebrow plucking on me down some New York side street. She had her makeup kit with her afterall. The very same kit worth THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS that she once left in my posession and I stupidly left overnight by mistake in my UNLOCKED office.

At the time, I recall waking up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat having realized what I'd done. I'd not only left a makeup kit worth thousands of dollars in my unlocked office but I'd left a long line of people in jeopardy - mostly Layla. Flashes of Lindsay Lohan with a unibrow came across my mind. Leonardo Di Caprio with uncovered zits for his upcoming movie premier. Diane Sawyer with cheap, Duane Reade style, hooker makeup that Diane applied herself in desperation so she might deliver the morning news.

Luckily when I got to the office the kit was still there. I recall a co-worker that walked by and looked at me strangely - a grown woman kneeling on the floor clutching a black, duffle bag full of makeup in her arms like it were a teddy.

Three raspberry/blueberry mojitos later Layla was off to her next appointment. Before leaving she passed me her card:

L: Sorry darling but your brows will have to wait. I'm due uptown. (Insert celeb I am not allowed to say) needs an emergency mustache wax. If I don't get there in time things could get ugly.

It was great to see Layla despite our short visit. Despite the fact that the next time she sees me - I'll look like Andy Rooney.

9 Comments:

At 9:59 AM, Blogger Polly Prissy-Pants said...

It's a good thing I don't have any friends who are obsessed with brows. I would be in big trouble.

 
At 12:54 PM, Blogger catsteevens said...

I can relate. If I don't keep mine under control I end up looking like Pete Sampras.

Did ya know there is even a website dedicated to this disturbing topic? Ya, check it out ~ www.monobrow.com

 
At 2:28 PM, Blogger posthipchick said...

i call an eyebrow waxing the poor girl's face lift.
it makes such a difference.

 
At 2:56 PM, Blogger aaannnaaa said...

i had to check who is andy rooney... ahahhaha you don't exist! I never did my eyebrows or mustache... i guess i'm quite lucky with the bodyhair problems... there are girls that suffer a lot with this issues... the lady that "waxes" me always says i'm lucky! There's a costumer of her that has to wax her butt... can you believe?!
It must be nice to have a friend such an expert in make up... i've always wanted to wear some blush or so and never know what to buy! sniff

ps. got your reply! ;)

 
At 3:08 PM, Blogger ~Deb said...

A drag queen once taught me to shave half my eyebrow off, in order to get that high ~dramatic~ eyebrown look as if I were insanely mad or just some weird sex fiend. I ended up looking like a freak show. People thought I was constantly angry.

Never take eye brow tips from a drag queen!

Your post was funny! Love your writing!

All the best,
~D

 
At 5:16 PM, Blogger ica said...

Cute story. Didn't know that there were berry mojitos.

 
At 6:27 PM, Blogger Kiki said...

Thanks for reminding me~ I need to get mine done soon!!

 
At 11:10 PM, Blogger jon said...

We are trying to find good scary movie to take the kids this weekend. Good scary movie reviews are hard to find

I just stumbled onto your blog while looking. Seems to happen to me a lot since I am a knowledge mooch LOL

Thanks

 
At 5:48 PM, Blogger Valery said...

I think that bodyhair problem is really important. I have chosen hair waxing, and you know, it helps:)

 

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