Friday, September 09, 2005

THINGS THAT HAPPEN RIGHT B4 YOU GET MARRIED

People are weird. Right before you get married they say strange, strange things. Things that are bold and inappropriate even if they don't know you like, "DON'T DO IT!" and slap you on the back cackling like a drunken sailor. Some people say, "Good luck with THAT one!" or even "So much for your sex life now, huh?!" to which I want to say, "Um...weird person...can you just SHUT up?"

Mostly people say things (nice people, people that love you, people trying to be nice) that they perhaps think they should ask you like, "ARE YOU EXCITED???????????" (no. not excited) or "COUNTING DOWN THE DAYS??????????" (to what?). Again. Nice people, people that love and know you but don't know what else to say. The other night I told E that I hope we have stuff to talk about after the wedding - only half joking.

And what's with registering places? AGH. Both of us browsed and browsed and created so many friggin registry lists only to pick one or two things from each and then finally turning to one another to say, "We don't want any of this. No Really." Literally. None of it. Beds and bookcases and dressers and chairs and tables - all types of furniture created from fake, ugly, stained wood made to look old. It all reminded me of a Universal Studios set. If you took a deep breath and exhaled you might blow the whole room away.

These places also sell things that sound like SNL skit props. Things like (and these are real) 'Maple Leaves, Set of 24'...we have friends coming from Maine to our wedding. What would they think of this? Or how about the 'Portable Ice Cube Maker'? Because just think of all those times you were at the beach or the park thinking what a better day it would have been if you'd brought your Portable Ice Cube Maker.

Not to sound so PC but why can't people just donate to the Red Cross? Or give us one of their drawings or photos? I really, really want a Nikon D50 but that isn't nice and wedding like now is it. Ok I admit I want one wedding type gift - towels and sheets, sheets and towels. Smother me in them. I want so many I could wrap a building in them. Like Christo.

18 Comments:

At 5:32 AM, Blogger Joe said...

Hey girl, you drove home a point I had not thought about!T A youn friend of my grand daughter is geting married ( she is only sixteen) I asked her why? Don't you see what is hapening amoung your friends? Not nice of me but darn I see to many get PG and the boy looks for fertial ground elsewhere!
I wish nothing but the best for you! Have a good weekend!

 
At 8:57 AM, Blogger blackbird said...

wedding registers are, in my opinion, for people under 30 (hmm, maybe you are) and for people whose friends have no taste. it could also be handy if you are inviting 350 people to your wedding.
I am thinking that none of these things apply to you.

 
At 11:28 AM, Blogger aaannnaaa said...

Here people can make registers at travel agencies too... wich is nice, all the guests could contribute to a nice honeymoon! ;) Most of the time the registers do not include furniture, but just sheets and towels, and glasses, plates, bla bla bla... things for the new house!

 
At 12:47 PM, Blogger jayKayEss said...

It's perfectly appropriate to ask people to donate to the Red Cross in your name; you wouldn't be the first. Make up a list of charities w/ phone numbers and URLs and send it out to your guests.

And hey, if a digital SLR is really what you want, then what the hell-- it's your wedding.

 
At 3:45 PM, Blogger liz said...

i have learned why people respond that way- i have been married over 6 yrs and i think most marriages have peaks and valleys. those that make snide remarks are most likely in a valley right now. your marrital journey will take on its own topographical map. that's the beauty of it. like a roller coaster you both get to build together as you are riding it. and sometimes the pieces of wood you are given are rotten, but sometimes they are aromatic oak. here's betting you have an eternal ride!

 
At 10:31 PM, Blogger Medjool said...

figure out a way to register for that camera. really, i bet your friends and family would appreciate that and contribute to it, because they know and love you.

my brother registered for golf clubs and he got 'em.

 
At 12:32 AM, Blogger rion said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 12:34 AM, Blogger rion said...

right before her wedding, someone asked a friend of mine if she was going to be quitting her job. -- yes, seriously.

if you don't hear that gem in the next week, consider it a clean getaway.

 
At 3:00 AM, Blogger Brooke said...

Listen, not to get all weddingy on you, but a good friend of mine gave me tjhis bowl from Nambe and every time we use it, I think, Karla gave me this, and more times than not I'll call her to say hello because of it.

That is the single only worthwhile thing about wedding presents... but five years on, it's pretty major.

And if you want to ask people to make donations to the Red Cross in your name, honey, so be it. Your family ought to know they're blessed to have such a good, kind person in the family tree. Godspeed, sugar.

 
At 2:08 PM, Blogger Floyd Tiny said...

Maybe you can register at B & H. I'm sure you'd find stuff THERE you'd both like...

 
At 8:20 PM, Blogger alissa said...

I registered for all sorts of stuff that we needed for our home - mostly kitchen stuff - wine glasses, place settings, flatware, etc. And linens too. For all the time I spent carefully picking out what we liked, 98% of our guests ignored the registry completely and bought us what they thought we'd like. Now I have a basement full of crap that will never see the light of day. Should your guests actually look at your registry, well... you're lucky. Also don't see why you couldn't register for the camera of your dream. Ditto asking for donations to Katrina (my in-laws live on the Gulf Coast). Personally I don't know anyone who has registered for furniture before..

 
At 11:48 PM, Blogger posthipchick said...

ugh, i always hated when people started bitching about their husbands and marriages after i got married, and told me 'you'll see'. maybe i won't.

i agree- registries are weird, especially when you're in your 30's and have everything you 'need'.

i guess you can always return things for store credits.

 
At 2:53 AM, Blogger Neil said...

Why don't you get registered to have everyone pay for an exotic honeymoon? I know people who have done that. That sounds more up your alley.

 
At 7:27 AM, Blogger lynn said...

here in holland, most wedding invitations suggest "an envelope with contents" as a gift, which means, of course, cash. the last bridal pair that i congratulated used their envelope contents to pay for their honeymoon.
and my cousin in madrid was registered at "el corte ingles" leading up to his wedding, but that was a different system: you chose a gift from the list, but only the amount was credited to their account, so that they could use the sum total however they pleased....

 
At 7:58 PM, Blogger 8709 said...

Interesting blog you have here, I landed here on accident. I was searcing for something else and came across your site. I found it pretty interesting and entertaining. I got you book marked.

I will pop back in from time to time to see what you have new here.

My site is a bit different than yours, but just as entertaining and educational, I run a mens male enhancement reviews related site pertaining to mens male enhancement reviews related articles.

 
At 6:20 PM, Blogger Steve Austin said...

Tasty blog! Please check out my australian wine blog.

 
At 7:31 AM, Blogger Best Buy said...

Decent page, enjoyed it a lot, I can never get enough of golf course equipment supply if you can't either check out my site golf course equipment supply

 
At 6:57 PM, Blogger Admin said...

Great blog, keep up the good work. Glad to see sites like this.

Here is another good site I said I would pass along.
Domain Names
Thanks

 

Post a Comment

<< Home


powered by SignMyGuestbook.com