WHAT YOUR BODY TELLS YOU
Last Saturday E and I enjoyed an amazing home cooked Korean meal at the lovely home of J and R. They are both smart, talented, funny and interesting people. J is also an amazing cook. They have the world's most adorable baby too that they were kind enough to let me kidnap on my lap for a while.
Sadly towards the end of the night I began to fade. My body was detoxing from all the recent stress at work and home. A lovely meal and interesting conversation forced me to relax for the first time in a long while and by Sunday I was wiped out entirely.
While at dinner R and I talked about the body's reaction to stress. R confessed that when he is home he occasionally suffers from allergies and various ailments now and again. When he travels they all seem to disappear. I confessed about my 'stress eye' - a red bump that appears in the same spot under my right eye when I feel stressed. Sunday, the morning after the dinner I woke up and there it was. The same red bump under my right eye. It was as if I'd called it up from the dead.
Since Sunday I have been resting. I am not a good rester. I get anxious. I look around the house at all the things that need cleaning. I feel guilty taking time off of work. I think I should be writing. I so badly want to check the 3,000 wedding items still left to do off my list but can't. I get angry. I ask myself, "How can all this laying on the couch watching bad TV be the perfect cure for stress?" I just don't get it. I think I am stronger than this. And then I cough and cough and cough until it feels that my chest is on fire and I am forced to get back on the couch again for more resting. It's funny what your body tells you. It feels the need to remind you how much stronger it is than you on a constant basis.
The minute I do rest and let go the better I begin to feel. Funny how that is. The things that don't get done for the upcoming wedding will have to go undone. I look forward to having my strength back and am starting to remember what really matters. For now I'm off to make some lunch and finish watching Days of Our Lives.