As many of you already know. Please never allow
me to wear a white sweatshirt that says,
'Cats, books...what else is there?'
Thanks.

The Fed-Ex man is whistling 'Lullaby and Goodnight'
the song you sing to put a baby down to sleep. It is
frankly...kind of creepy.

This morning at 5:45am I woke up to a grown man
my neighbor across the way screaming 'oh my
fucking god!' and 'wooo-hooooo!' and 'Yeah!!!!!!
Fuck yeah!!!!!'

At first I thought he was having sex, then I thought
he may be beating up his girlfriend because he
sounded totally demented. Then I remembered
that the US was playing Portugal in the World
Cup. Men. Jesus.