DORM LIFE

Today one of my best friends from England wrote an email,

"Hey...there is an open house in your neighborhood today from 12-1:30pm. I thought instead of calling you at 8am on a Saturday morning I'd write you an email. Let me know if you can check it out for us and/or take some digital pix. If not no worries. Wasn't meant to be."

My friend, her husband and child hope to relocate back to the states by December. They are trying to find an apartment while in England and finding it a very hard process despite their resonable price range. True friendship is not calling your non-kid having friend any time before 11 on a Saturday. True friendship is also hauling your non-kid having ass over on a Saturday morning to take digital pix of a place you can only one day dream of living in. But truth be told who doesn't enjoy a little open house now and again?

So what does $3,500 a month buy you in Brooklyn these days?

E and I hopped on our bikes and went to find out. When we got there E said, 'I'm not going in just so you know.' partially because he was dressed like an unshaven burglar and partially because he... well I don't know. I was just happy he watched the bikes.

The guy had a point. Perhaps I could have taken a moment to consider what I was wearing seeing as I was representing my friend, her husband and her baby. I was dressed in a moss green sweater, jeans, green clogs and my hair was in braids. I felt like an idiot when I entered the room surrounded by well dressed couples wondering who invited Joni Mitchell to the open house.

The place was HUGE. GIANT. ENORMOUS and yet still not great. Welcome to New York real estate people. It had three main rooms, a pink crappy small bath and one skinny kitchen leading to two more rooms off the back. There was also outdoor space.

Have you ever looked at an apartment for someone else? It seems a lot easier than it is. I mean my friend and I have lived on and off with one another for years but did this still qualify me to house hunt for her and her entire family? I mean it's one thing to live with your girlfriend in a five story walk up roach infested place in the East Village but times have changed. What do I know as far as how much room a baby needs? Just because I don't mind things somewhat rough around the edges doesn't mean they will. I snapped a number of digital photos and prayed for the best.




After the tour I called my friend in England and gave her the low down. She asked, "Would you live there?" I paused and truly considered my answer, "I think I would."

E and I soon hopped on our bikes again and peered in the windows of the brownstones we passed on our way home. We considered biking more but instead decided to head back to our dorm room, throw some Ramen noodles on the hot plate and call it lunch.

TV THERAPY

Shows I watched last night because I was depressed after a long day:

Dog The Bounty Hunter-quite fascinating. It's a real family affair. Especially when Dog's recently knocked up younger daughter Dog hasn't seen in six years 'Baby Lisa' comes to town. Lisa goes on a bust with dad and it was quite a bonding moment. Dog has plenty of wisdom on life to share and I found it really lifted my spirits. Therapy: Like when Dog said, "If there is one lesson I've learned in life it's that if you want something real bad you gotta work your BLEEP off for it."

Random 1 - the new series on A&E about two annoying dudes that ride around in a truck and try and do good things for people. The concept of the show seemed great and the promos got me hooked to watch it but the guys are so unbearable and annoying to watch I don't know that I'll be going back. Therapy: You don't have to be annoying to help people. And it did remind me that my life is pretty good and I should maybe put a cork on that bottle of wine I brought with me to the couch and shut the hell up.

America's Next Top Model - you know...sometimes you really have to not only want something in life but really REALLY act like you do so that it is visible on the outside too. Therapy: Plus it doesn't matter if you are fat or thin or black or white it's your inner beauty and self-love that will carry you through life. (yeah right)

My Fair Brady - Adrienne from an old America's Next Top Model season (who speaks like her jaw is wired shut) is shacking up with Bobby from the Brady Brunch. Therapy: If you at any point in your relationship thought it was going REALLY badly...it wasn't and you will know this after watching these people.

Hogan Knows Best - I am slightly addicted to this show I will admit it. I am fascinated how Hulk and his wife Linda raise two kids and try and keep them being good kids despite their celeb status. I am also fascinated that they have their very own tanning booth in the upstairs bathroom. Therapy: You thought your dad was tough on you as a teenager, at least he didn't have a one on one with a kid you wanted to go to Busch Gardens with and grill him on his sex life.

To be honest...I must confess...I watched three episodes back to back of Hogan Knows Best. And just so you know, when a bunch of Research and Programming people sit in a conference room in Times Square speaking of ways to 'hook the viewer' with various 'programming blocks' they are speaking of me. Hooking me. Hook line and sinker. Tired, bad mood, wine bottle and chips in hand, wearing husband's sweats and sweatshirt - hood up trying to make the world go away for a while - even if only in short, half hour blocks.

PUNKINS

Last night we carved pumpkins. I told E it would only take 15 minutes because that is the trick line I use ever time to get him to try things he doesn't want to do. 'It will just take 15 minutes...I swear." Then we have fun and he likes it.

Some kids came to the door and we didn't have any candy so E gave them some change from our gigantic change bag. Why does everyone in life have so much change? Everyone. Some put it in a cup. Some in a jar. My old coworker used to buy all of her Christmas gifts with her leftover change that she had collected over an entire year. There is so much change in our change bag despite what we gave away that we could not only buy Christmas gifts for our entire family but also put a downpayment on the brownstone down the block which is for sale.

Jane the orange tabby cat also enjoyed pumpkin carving. Having to be involved in anything family related she parked herself on the back of the seat E was sitting in and kept peeking her tiny head up to sniff and sniff the pumpkin guts.

Our verbal exchange while carving became very Montessori school teacher and student:

E: This is messy.
K: It is supposed to be.
E: This isn't turning out very well
K: There isn't a wrong way!
E: My idea is stupid
K: Let me see. Oh my god that is great!

And it was great. E 'shaved' a bird (I love birds) on his pumpkin complete with two musical notes. It was very Martha Stewart. I was so impressed.

K: Where did we get our pumpkins again?
E: From our honeymoon in Maine!
K: Oh yeah...at that little farmstand

I carved my pumpkin which like myself ended up looking just goofy and in love and happy.

COKE GIRL IN BOLLYWOOD

Today I escaped to lunch with an office friend and enjoyed an amazingly cheap and delicious Indian food buffet not far from where we work. The place was so mellow and nice and the smells of the various food cooking was so intense but in only the best possible way. The place was decorated with Christmas lights and the music fitting the scene. A giant TV playing Bollywood movies was hanging from the wall. We sat down to share a table with a guy sitting by himself.

Me: Mind if we sit here?
G: (pause looking at me) No...not at all.

I sit down and start talking to my friend and the guy is staring over at me. Not in a bad way just in a 'I know you from somewhere' kind of way. Finally I say something,

K: Hi. Good to see you.
G: I'm sorry...are you....Coke girl?

he asked refering to this photo E took of me and posted on-line a while ago.

K: (laughing) Why yes...yes I am.

My co-worker gave a puzzled look and shrugged. We all went back to eating our Indian food. Welcome to New York people where it's a small world after all.

YOU GO GIRL!: ANDREW KRUCOFF

This may come as a shock to you (yeah right) but sometimes I am 'behind the times'. I am not 'in the know' in the blog world as much as perhaps I could be. I am certainly not as cool as my husband that's for sure.

Just this morning to my horror I read on Gawker that fellow blogger pal Andrew Krukoff lost his job in a sort of blog related fashion. Some of you may remember me blogging about Andrew when on vacation in Mexico

Andrew - not sure if you are reading this but if you are...I wanted to share a little phrase my grandmother once wrote in a card to me during some rough times.

"You Go Girl!"

I know you are a boy and stuff but perhaps this phrase will carry you through as it did me.

BDAY FOR PAPA

Last night was my papa's bday. He is 59 going on 21. He came into the city and E and I, my stylish younger sister sporting a Sienna Miller short haircut (she is a hair stylist) and her two friends and our family friends J & J in from Virginia joined the crowd. It was a fun mix of people and a great night.

At first we were SoHo bound headed to Blue Ribbon Sushi on a Saturday night at 7:30pm (they don't take reservations). I know. What were we thinking. It was an hour and a half wait and the lobby was full of people willing to wait out the hour and a half. Not us. Instead we went around the block to Aquagrill where the only seating available was in the lounge area by the front door. An L shaped seating arrangement and a few little tiny tables close to the ground, my dad said, 'We'll take it!'

Despite sitting under intense tracklighting and eating formal meals with our plates on our laps, the food was fantastic, the wine wonderful and the company fun. My dad got shrimp cocktail which they served warm. Puzzled, my father asked our Toby Maguire lookalike waiter:

D: Excuse me, may I ask why the shrimp cocktail is warm?
W: The chef feels like it brings out the natural sweetness in the shrimp
D: Huh

Towards the end of our meal I told my sister to grab the waiter and order our pops a cake with a bday candle in. Nobody likes this tradition but at least it gave me an excuse to blame it on my sister when it came out. The whole place sang 'Happy Birthday' and my dad looked horrified. Finally payback for not letting me have Barbies as a kid.

After we got the check my sister and her two friends were off to a costume party where they were meeting up with their gay friends dressed in drag and as gondola guys. Dad jumped in a taxi to head to our family friends apartment where he was crashing for the night. Our friends J & J headed to the train station. E and I tried calling serveral of our friends with hopes of meeting up with people. It didn't happen. No one called us back. Instead we blamed each other for not having made a plan and fought and got annoyed with one another but luckily made up before bed.